It makes sense that my boy is my teacher and it is almost comical to think that I thought I knew what was best for him. He already has what I have been seeking.
I meditate on a almost daily basis in order to go to that place inside of me that is close to God. My son resides there.
I yearn for the day I literally do not care what people think of me. My son never cared what people thought of him until I taught him the importance of social skills.
I am just now after about 35 years taking off the mask, cutting the bullshit and being who I am.. being genuine, and authentic no matter the consequences. My son has always operated from this place of authenticity..... until I taught him it wasn't polite to do so. Until I provided the stiff consequences.
My son knows what he wants and does what he wants. As a result of doing what he loves, expressing himself fully since the age of 3, he has allowed his divine intelligence to be expressed through his amazing works of art. After second-guessing and doubting myself and being caught in my own mind chatter for the majority of my life....I am just now beginning to go after what I want.
Sometimes I wonder why I would want my son to see the big picture when God is clearly in the details.
I look forward to the lessons that lie ahead.
~C.
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